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What we hate, we make.

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This is it, this is it. [22 Jun 2005|03:07am]

Heyyyyy guys.
I'm leaving this lj behind.  I'm sick of the name, 11-07 was when Anthony and I got together. 
My sister set me up a new one.
It's going to be friends only, I'll be automatically adding alot of you, but if you want added let me know.
Half the people I read don't read me...so, yeah, just let me know if you want added.



Goooooooodbye journal!

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[21 Jun 2005|01:51pm]
New AIM Name: give em hell bri

We won our game yesterday....another one Wednesday. Work today 3-close.
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You're my sunshine after the rain... [20 Jun 2005|12:59am]
[ mood | cranky ]

Decent day, decent day. We won both of our slow pitch games, thank goodness. Man the drama after! Guys in their late 30s or maybe even 40s need to grow the FUCK up. Seriously, this guy was rediculous. He wanted to fight our pitcher and all kinds of things. Mike, Tim, Ari, and me booked it to Follansbee for my game. My parents showed up too. How cute it was with everyone there! Ariana took some pictures, they're in her journal. Too bad it's FRIENDS ONLY, bitches. Wow what a mood I am in. The Mavericks ended the season 4-5-1 today with a loss to the Rockies. We held them big time, though. I had a nice game on the field. Actually when my Coach called she said I had a great game. I think she's afraid of me. Now it's off to playoffs, which start for us tomorrow at 8 vs. the Chics. So if all goes well we should still get to play after that!

After the game I dropped the boys off at their car and came home. Hopefully I'm getting my hair done tomorrow and it will look hella different. Let's hope.

Ariana and I composed these awesome CDs with some old school music on them. New Kids on the Block, 98 Degrees, NSYNC, BSB, Hanson, and stuff like that. It was so fun to jaim to those. Oh yeah! And Kris Kross! Haha too much.

Anyways, game tomorrow. Mike's coming to that...yay! I don't like that he works so much I get bored.

Sounds good.Collapse )

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[19 Jun 2005|02:39am]
[ mood | confused ]

What a long frekkin' day.

I woke up early and went to Robinson for lunch and shopping with the family. It was the first time in awhile I ventured out with them, and I figured out why. Nothing has changed, everyone still gets frustrated and we always lose someone in the mall. I had to rush home and meet Tim so we could go to Jenna's party for a few. We ate, felt out of place, and left. He went back later with Mike while I was at work. So at work I busted my ass to clean things up and make the time go quicker. Mike and Tim visited and then after I got off I booked it home and got ready for them to pick me up.

We headed down to Mountaineer to gamble a bit. I brought $30, minus getting some McDonald's on the way. I came home with $20, only because I stopped. I didn't win anything. I thought the machines were boring and monotonous. I was overwhelmed with how many people were there and how many different machines. We were there for about 45 minutes, lol. It just isn't my cup of tea. I'm glad we popped that cherry though!

I saw Anthony today, for a split second, as we drove past Ray's. Something inside me kind of died at that moment. I was never good enough...will never be good enough. I know it is the past I just want to understand why. Ugh. I haven't had the chance to get over him. After a long time of us being together and me being hurt. GET A LIFE BRIONNA.

Anyways...softball tomorrow. I love Sundays.

I have a good thing going for me. I can't let anything screw this up. Funny how instead of "anything" I almost typed "Anthony". Ironic.

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Rawr? [18 Jun 2005|12:28am]
What a long day...I've been waking up early and actually going tanning. So I went tanning then got called into work a whole hour early! Oh no! So I go in and get my $71.56 paycheck, what bull, and work. We were soo busy and I had to work Apparel, Team Sports, Shoes, Fitness, and Lodge half of the night. I had to hold a shot gun, so I broke into a sweat for some reason and started shaking. I think it's because of the whole McHugh-Gun thing, I can't touch them. Then some stupid hicks yelled at me because the system to authorize people is down, and they couldn't buy a gun. Maybe someone with their kind of temper doesn't need a gun. Mike came to visit then waited for me to get off work and we went to Kings. Then to Wal*Mart...

Whoo I got The Rocket Summer - "Hello, good friend." CD. Awesome. It's my one and only treat with my paycheck. Picked a card up for Jenna since her graduation party is tomorrow.

Oh yah! Tomorrow we're going to Mountaineer or Wheeling Downs! My gambling cherry will be popped! I'm scared...I think I will only bring $20 in so I don't waste all of my money. I don't know though I'm not familiar with these things.

CO-ED Sunday at 4 and 5, then I fly to Follansbee for my fastpitch game at 7. Fun times!
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What a thing to wake up to. [16 Jun 2005|11:54am]
[ mood | gloomy ]

spamcheese77: found a new faggot that ain't goin to do shit with his life

That's Anthony...yes, constantly putting me down. Maybe if he wasn't such an ass...

You know what I let this stupid comment from him get to me. I want to go back to bed.

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I copied Christina... [15 Jun 2005|04:50pm]
My pimp name...
Macktastic Brionna Flava

So I showed up at work and clocked in and then found out they switched my schedule without telling me. Fuck I hate that place anymore! So I came home and now have to work Friday and Saturday night. = (

Mike's at work right now so I am bloody bored. I doubt Tim will umpire tonight because it looks like rain but if he does that's where I will go to kill some time. Gosh this town sucks!

JCC called me to play, how funny. Only because I said something to one of the guys. Too bad they play at the same time as I play for Mike and Tim! Sillys.

I'm wearing one yellow sock and one black sock to support the Pirates today. They're playin' the Yankees. Eww. Mike's favorite team is the Yanks so this is a fun little rivalry. I also watched the basketball game last night! I'm on his side for this I guess so go Pistons? Haha.

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I need to start sleeping...and this is going to start shit! [14 Jun 2005|03:49am]
I found the Ramen! Okay, so it's a survey.Collapse )
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[13 Jun 2005|11:47pm]
[ mood | cranky ]

I am tired of being put down and feeling like shit because of it. I do not YELL at Anthony I simply tell him that I don't like what he does and that I worry about him. How fucking hard is it to see you are wasting your life and ruining alot of good things. Go ahead and find someone who will put up with as much as I did and still care about you. It won't happen. Some people never learn. They go through punishments that would make other people change their lives dramatically and then there's him, who after he gets in trouble for one thing moves onto the next. And thinks it's okay. Well it's not. I was feeling upset about not being with him but now I feel upset for still letting him get to me.

I know the people I am with now are good people, genuinly good people. They won't do the things that he did to me. I have found someone who actually cares and suprises me and thinks the world of me. Someone who pays attention to the little details. The littlest details. Someone who calls me beautiful EVERY FUCKING DAY. Someone who goes out of their way to make me feel important. I don't care what everyone else says, I really don't. I just wish people would SHUT THE FUCK UP.

I was put down today and the lowest blows were dealt. I cried and I felt bad and I wanted to run and do things I shouldn't. But I didn't. Instead I went to the ball fields and watched Tim umpire and Bob and Brad play. Then we went and got Giannamore's, since Brad's from out of town and had never experienced it. Good stuff. Then I saw Mike for a few minutes at Wal*Mart.

I just wish Anthony would realize I made a mistake in the past and that if he would have just gotten over it, as hard as it may have been, and seen that I wasn't going to do it again, things would have been great. I loved that boy more than anyone could love a person. I still care for him but I can not let him get to me anymore. I've got a headache again today from thinking about it.

It is nice to know that SOMEONE misses me and someone wants the best for me. I know I have people that will help me through this and keep me happy. I'm not going to screw that up. I know they are my true friends, despite what Anthony says. I just wish he could see that we could have been together forever, that everything could have been perfect.

But you know what, I don't think I will miss it. I like how my life is right now, it's just a shame I can't be proud of him or be happy when I talk to him.

I'll cut this soo it doesn't take up space on everyone's list...haha just a little song for the moment.Collapse )

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I've never been so lost, I've never felt so much at home... [13 Jun 2005|01:53pm]
Yesterday was softball all day. We went 3-1 so it was a pretty good day. Tim yelled at Jenna and me and we took it personally at first so it kind of put a damper on things, but we got over it. It was bloody hot out so I ran home after the games and got a shower...so I could go back to the fields. I met Mike, Tim, Bob, and Brad at the new McDonalds, which is pretty nice by the way, and we ate then headed back to the fields. Cute things happened for Tim I was happy. Then Mike and I left to meet Jenna and Rob and come back here.

Now, that was a trip and a half. Rob is a freakin' nut. Jenna and I both had migraines so she lef tot take Rob home and Mike and I just watched some TV then he left. I ended up sleeping on the bathroom floor because I was throwing up so much. Ugh. Not to mention I have a huge lump on my leg from when I hurt it. I wish it would go away without me having to take a week off from ball. Cuz....screw that!

Anyways Mike just stopped by in between his two jobs to cheer me up. It worked for a bit but I still feel like death. I think I'm just going to lay around tonight.

I haven't talked to Joe in a week! I don't really feel that bad that I just wrote him off. I mean, shit happens. He was being an asshole anyways. I haven't talked to Anth in a few days but I just can't do it right now...

Last regular fastpitch game tomorrow. We got our pictures in they turned out pretty good. Then we'll have playoff's, which may be like one game. Then it's nothing but CoEd for me! Not that that's a problem!
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What goes on... [11 Jun 2005|02:26am]
I haven't updated in awhile, I don't really feel like talking over this thing much anymore...

Yesterday some people came over to watch the Piston's game. I hate watchin' basketball on TV but I had a good time. Anything is better with a tray of Giannamore's!

We lost our game against the Bobcats but only after my ESPN like catch. The coaches shoved me in the outfield but I ended up making what the umpire called "The Catch of Follansbee Fastpitch" this year. Woo hoo.

Today I went to the mall with Anthony for awhile. I picked out a new pair of flip flops that didn't cut my foot. I came home and got all fancied up in my skirt and Mike picked me up so we could head over to Megan's graduation party in Follansbee. I felt super akward since I only knew her and her sister but I gave her the card, ate a little, then left. We went and watched Tim umpire a little but we were way too hungry to stay so we left and went to the Ville. After Tim got done we went to King's for desert then to Wal*Mart. You know, the usual.

I've been doin' pretty good on the cutting down smoking thing. I'm not ready to quit but I barely smoke anymore. Yay. Good things are happening to me. It's about time.

I still miss some things though.

I haven't talked to Joe since Dave Matthews. Ahaha. Haha. Hahaha.

Anyways...my cell phone is being crazy and won't let me send messages or get calls or anything. I guess it's all of Cingular or something. Blah, I am ready to switch. It is getting crazy!

Game tomorrow night...then 4 co-ed games on Sunday for Mike and Tim. Should be....exciting? Haha. To say the least.

I need to try and sleep. Last night I ended up sleep walking, which I don't think I have ever done. I woke up holding my toothbrush in the bathroom. Weird. I can't sleep anymore. Ugh.
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May angels lead you in... [08 Jun 2005|01:32pm]
[ mood | gloomy ]

So I ended up having a game last night. We tied because they wouldn't let us play one more inning. I hit a triple so good enough.

I went to the drive in and saw The Longest Yard again and Sahara. Good times.

I feel sick.

I need to get ready for work.

I'm sure the view from Heaven beats the hell out of mine here.Collapse )

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Oh...yeah... [06 Jun 2005|05:19pm]
1. I look like a lobster. Maybe twenty minutes on my first day of tanning again was too much. I match the red shirt I'm wearing.

2. I got stopped leaving Kroger's today by a guy I kind of know. He asked if he could take me out for drinks sometime. I said I don't drink, so he said we could go and grab some dinner. I gave him my number (probably a dumb thing) and left. He's 35. I did NOT know this at the time. Ha. Haha. Hahaha.

3. I went to the gym with Anthony. He gave me his "Mingo Woosh Crew" shirt because it is my favorite ever. We had a good time even though it was painfully hot in there.

4. I argued with Mike a bit today. Through text messages. Argh oh well.
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Go back to being friends.... [06 Jun 2005|12:45pm]
So Dave Matthews was a good time. The parking lot was crazy packed. The opening band wasn't actually too bad, just too hippy for me. It seemed like FOREVER before Dave came out. I loved listening to him I just wish he would have played more of his older songs instead of a bunch of new ones. I am an OLD fan lol. I saw Meredith before the show but I didn't get to see Steph since I'm not VIP enough lol. Joe was alright, didn't really try anything except sittin' real close so I moved away haha. There was soo much pot smokin' go on everywhere. I was gettin' pissed at the song selection...then the very last song, during the encore, he played Ants Marching. So I can die happy now. I got a cute baseball tee that only cost me $32, ha. It took us about 45 minutes to get out of the parking lot then I went to King's with Chelsea. It was good hangin' out with her again.

I guess I'm going to the tanning bed so everyone can stop making fun of me. I have a horrible tan from softball. I mean, my glove hand is WHITE and the other is pretty tan. Not to mention the few inches on my legs between my socks and shorts lol.

Anyways I guess I'll do this thing since Ariana picked me...

List your current six favorite songs, then pick six other people that have to do the same.

1. Keith Urban - Memories of Us
2. Dave Matthews Band - Ants Marching
3. hellogoodbye - If You Wanna I Might
4. Journey - Any Way You Want It
5. David Grey(Gray?) - Babylon
6. Something Corporate - Konstantine *Because it is always my favorite song!*

I pick :: Adrienne, Perko, Steph, Mere, Chels, Jenna
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Memories of us.... [05 Jun 2005|12:58am]
Kennywood was awesome...it was a great day weather wise, the lines weren't bad, and we all had a bunch of fun. Tim got on some rides he swore he wouldn't and I rode some water rides. I guess they weren't that bad lol. I don't think I got much of a tan, I need to work on that I look gross. The ride back was a blast. Tim and I sang real loud and it was just....fun? All this fun in one day normally doesn't happen to me!

Tomorrow is going to be crazy. Co Ed got all switched and I won't be able to play at all...maybe one game. Sucks. Then Dave and who knows after that...

I am achy and tired so this is going to be an early night!!
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Just.....ugh. [04 Jun 2005|01:58am]
[ mood | crappy ]

What a fucking day.
This is the first horrible day I have had in awhile.
I feel soo frustrated and stressed for some reason.

I woke up early and had nothing to do.
I went to WalMart and saw Mike for a few minutes, used my discount to buy him some shoes at Dick's, and came home.
I went to softball and played a fucking horrible game. Thank goodness my team can make up for my fuck ups and we managed to win.
Joe showed up and I just wanted to tell him to fuck off. He says the stupidest fucking things. I told him I was going home. And to meet me in Weirton for DMB on Sunday. That will be all the time I will spend with him. He shows up and sits by my parents. He started talking about Mike and Tim to them. GET A FUCKING LIFE. MAYBE A FUCKING CLUE WHILE YOU'RE AT IT...WE'RE DONE JOE.
After ball I went to Dick's and bought some shoes. I met Tim there and we made some plans.
I'm in a bad mood by then but being pretty nice...

I get a shower and go to Jenna's. Watch her tapes of her walking on glass and they had Anthony in them. It was a karate tape.
Tim showed up and eventually Mike came.
We went to King's and BAM! Bad mood.
It was "Pick on Brionna" night and no one informed me so that I could stay home.

My "skater" clothes got picked on, the waitress told me I was going to become diabetic because I use too much sugar...blah blah blah.
I tore into Mike a few times because I was just in a horrible mood.
I ended up throwing my car door into his balls and knocking him into the ground.
Then I left.

Now I have alot on my mind and not alot of time to sleep it off.
I'm picking up Jenna at 11:30 and we're meeting the guys to go to Kennywood.
I know I will have alot of fun if I let myself.
Oh yeah, no smoking at all tomorrow.

Chelsea is coming into town and I have to see her I need some old times back.

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My mom found this. It's those little things in life. [03 Jun 2005|12:57pm]
Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
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[03 Jun 2005|12:28pm]
Guess who is going to a bunch of Pirates games this year??
My mum bought this thing for $31, where you get three free tickets and 15 by one get one free coupons. Not to mention you can get baseline boxes. Whooo hooo.

So I worked yesterday which wasn't too bad. After I went to King's with Mike and Tim and Jenna met us there with her friend Heather.

Then I talked to Anthony. Everyone say "Hi Anthony" since he is reading this. Good luck on your test Anth.

I talked to Joe who is just a piece of shit and I really don't even want to go to this concert at all now, even though I love Dave Matthews. Err.

I have fastpitch tonight....Kennywood tomorrow....Fastpitch then 2 out of 4 games with Mike and Tim and then DMB on Sunday.

Busy weekend for once.
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= ) [31 May 2005|03:48am]
Who cares that softball got rained out? Who cares that I struck out?

Not me!

Mike, Tim, and Bob came over to watch me. I felt bad because it got rained out and I did horrible. I was a bundle of nerves! After they called it I came home and left Anth's crap in the driveway so he could come get it. Ugh. Then...

I went and met Mike, Tim, and Jenna at the movies. We saw The Longest Yard which was a pretty darnd good movie. Afterwards Mike and I sat in my car and hung out in WalMart for over three hours. Three hours. I had the best time playing CDs at WalMart and sitting in my car talking to him. I had really misjudged him and so has everyone else. You would be very surprised if you took the time to get to know him. I have never been friends with such a good person. A truely good person. We finally decided to call it a night and go home lol.

Tomorrow I play and then Mike and Tim are coming to meet my mother, since she's worried and all. That should be fun! Then who knows what we will do. Kennywood is definately on for Saturday though!

It's time to let go of the past and start looking at the future...which right now seems pretty damn good to me!!
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[30 May 2005|04:13pm]
I finished "The Lovely Bones" today. I recommend it if you like to read, I couldn't put it down.

Anthony called quite a few times today, and I didn't answer at all. Keep it up, ugh.


I cleaned my car out today, very well I might add. I have a trunk, and you can actually see it now!

I am in a good mood even with all of the drama going on.
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